2025 02 09 Off-grid with Marjory Wildcraft

➡ Marjorie shares her journey of exploring sexuality, from her younger years filled with vibrant sexual energy to her later experiences with spiritual teachings and tantric yoga. She discusses the concept of moving sexual energy through the chakra system, which she initially resisted but later embraced. Marjorie’s experiences with tantric workshops and spiritual teachers greatly influenced her understanding of sexuality and its connection to spirituality. Despite her enthusiasm for these practices, she found that her partner did not share the same desire for this deeper level of connection, leading to some tension in their relationship.
➡ The speaker reflects on her past experiences, including her 22-year marriage and subsequent divorce, her spiritual journey, and her return to meditation. She discusses her changing views on relationships and sexuality as she ages, and her increased interest in spiritual practices and sciences. She also mentions her work with Dr. Joe Dispenza, which helped her overcome her addiction to fear and ultimately led to the end of her marriage.
➡ The speaker discusses their personal journey of self-discovery and spiritual growth, including their interest in understanding what happens after death. They mention reading various spiritual texts and exploring concepts like reincarnation and conscious immortality. They also talk about their decision to abstain from sex as part of their spiritual journey, and how they’ve learned to control their emotions and state of mind. Lastly, they express concern about the control of media and the materialistic focus of society.
➡ The speaker discusses how society, influenced by media like music and movies, is heavily focused on sex and longevity. They express their involvement in this world and how it’s shaped by role models seen in media. They also ponder on the idea of not being involved with sex or love on a physical level, suggesting it’s not a common viewpoint. The speaker ends by expressing interest in hearing other perspectives on this topic.

Hey, this is Marjorie and yeah, today I want to have a talk with you about just some thoughts on sexuality. And honestly, I don’t have like a whole thing figured out or worked out. There’s just a bunch of rambling ideas that have been. I’ve been working with throughout my life and that have been coming forward. And I will say right up front that this is really a conversation, it’s a mature conversation. Not that I’m going to get into anything too explicit or anything, but that a lot of the ideas and concepts may not be applicable to you until you’re in some later stages of your life.

In fact, I heard a lot of these. I heard some parts of these ideas. When I was a lot younger, actually in my 30s, I got to work with a spiritual teacher. His name was Dr. Brewjoy. He only had small groups and he was one of those guys that. There’s a lot of these teachers. They’re really, really extreme, extraordinary people and they don’t want to be famous and whatever. So, yeah, Sabru was pretty amazing. And I was in my 30s. I don’t know why he let me into that group because the average age for most of the people was about 60, right.

And so some of the things I was hearing or listening to, I was like, oh my, no way am I gonna. Anyway. And I have to say, it was wonderful to be in a circle with people that were that much older and had lived through a whole bunch of life cycle life experiences and seen patterns repeat over and over again, reflect back on them without the same energy or the same angst that you have when you’re, when you’re younger. So, yeah, so sexuality. And at that time, one of the concepts they had was that, you know, when sexual energy is like down there, right down there, you know, the root chakra, the second chakra, right? And you know, you feel it, right? And it’s vibrating and hot.

Oh my God. I had so much sexual energy when I was. We still do actually. And they were saying, well, you can move that up through your chakra system that you can move that energy consciously up. And I was like, why would I want to do that? I think I’m having a good time, right? You know, and I did, I had a, A fabulous time, right? The kids these days call it a hoe phase, right? So this is in my 30s. I. I’d been in one real long term relationship and that had ended. And then before I.

There’s a period of, I don’t know, eight years or something like that before I Got into another long term relationship and yeah, oh my God. Incredibly good time. Don’t fuck without a condom. I mean that was the rule, right? I was super worried about all that because we know that there’s all that that can happen. But I was very careful and got tested regularly and that kind of thing anyway. But I had a wonderful time and had a lot of sexual energy. In fact, when I did get to settle down with ultimately Dave, we spent 22 years together, he was a little nervous.

He’s like, with your. When I get settled in, I’m loyal. Right. You know, and I was. That was never an issue in the, in the marriage. But yeah, I couldn’t imagine moving sexual energy up. It was great down there. I was having a great time. And one of the things that I had always been interested, you know, I’d always wanted to do a tantric yoga thing. And there used to be a wonderful teacher. His name was Charles Moir M U I R and his wife Carolyn at that time, this is 25 years ago, maybe more, 26 years ago.

And they did a wonderful week long thing, went to Guadalajara. And I had always looked for a partner that I would want to be with to do it. I didn’t want that to be, you know, casual sex by any means. And when Dave and I were dating, I said, would you be interested in this? And he’s not normally the seminar kind of guy, but he is a guy. And he was like, yeah, let’s try that. And he loved it. And it was, I would say it’s a real foundation of our marriage. And they taught a lot of things in there.

And the union, you know, of couples for the men withholding ejaculation and a lot about the chakras and energy and hi. For women, how to work with our energy in the shakti. And we did pooja and it was just a wonderful, wonderful week long thing. And it was actually just a great way to start the marriage because we learned a lot about how to be with each other physically, to express love. And it worked really well. The kids came along and I’d say about eight, eight or 10 years into the marriage we went back for another week long.

That one was in Hawaii and had a really wonderful, wonderful time a week. It was a good, good time to reconnect, you know, after the kids are born and you’ve gone through all the diapers and all that stuff and you kind of lose track of each other and then we can, you know, and then life is going on and I could see that I wanted something else and I was looking for something else. And. And we went back for a weekend in Boston. Like the three day kind of a thing, more of a touch up type tantric thing.

And this time Charles had a new wife, new partner, Leah and I had one, I would say one of my top, one of the top spots, spiritual experiences I’ve ever had in my life during that weekend. And it was. They would have home play, right? You don’t have homework, you have home play. And as a part of that seminar workshop thing, one of the things that Charles would do and Leah was he would do a demonstration of. He would pick a student actually and do a demonstration of how to work with. He would be pleasuring a woman with his hands and how to move Shakti and how to help her.

And then there would also be another demonstration on another night. This time Leah would be working with a man and showing the women how to pleasure the men and using your hands anyway. And then you’d go home and your hotel and you would practice it with each other. And it was during the time that I was pleasuring Dave and I was just overcome with this incredible energy. I mean, just incredible energy. I felt it was now there was no penetration going on at this point. You know, I’m just using my hands to pleasure him. But it was unbelievably orgasmic.

It’s like the best orgasm I’d ever had. But there was no inter, you know, there was no. Whatever they call it. I’m getting some kind of message here. I don’t know what that message means. Maybe it’s, maybe it’s the Internet telling me I’m getting too personal anyway. And it just felt like we were in this huge column of light and this energy was flowing. And Dave told me later, he said, you know, you looked like you were like 20 something and you were just radiant. And it was just this, just like, oh, I’m like, oh my God.

This is what I’ve always been looking for in this tantric energy. And I remember being very conscious of it and then slowly, slowly ending it and shutting it down between us. And oh my goodness, after that weekend, I was so dedicated. I was like, wow, I want to do that again. That was why we were doing this tantric energy. This is what they were talking about all that time. And it sort of dawned on me after a while that that was not at all his perspective. He was totally fine with just the physical level of interaction, right.

And we had great times together throughout that whole marriage. Don’t get me wrong, we had wonderful times together, but I wanted that next level. And it was very clear. I don’t know, how could you be there and then not want that? So I don’t know how he could not have wanted to. And that was a big shock to. In the relationship that we had just gone through that together. And he wasn’t wanting to pursue that like a bulldog with a stick, you know, like. Like we got. And. And I kept saying, let’s go. You know, maybe we kept doing things and, you know, and he was totally, again, totally good on the physical level.

And I said, maybe. Maybe it’s just because we were with, you know, Charles and Leah and you know how there is an induction when you’re with a teacher or a spiritual teacher or somebody who can really work with energy, being with them or near them within the group, and then you can be inducted into it. And I thought, well, maybe that’s what it is. I said, let’s go do another. Let’s go do another one. I want to do another one. He was like, no, we don’t have the time, we don’t have the money, whatever. And I’m like, what? That was one of the most.

That’s like the most amazing thing that’s happened to me. One of the top five experimentals, spiritual experiences of my entire life. And you’re so blase about it. And it really, you know, a divorce, when you separate, it’s always way more than just one thing, right? And we were together ultimately for 22 years. So, you know, that’s not everything. But that was a huge piece for me. Realizing that there were some fundamental differences in ideology there. And I thought, well, you know, this is Shakti. It’s Kundalini. It’s energy. I don’t necessarily need to go through a tantric thing.

You don’t have to have a partner. You can meditate and do this. Right? I mean, it’s Kundalini energy. Right? So I. I started getting back into a meditative practice, which. I don’t know why I dropped it for most of the marriage. That was probably one of the dumbest things I’d ever done in my used to be. I was a meditator from like, my God, My sister and I, we were like. When we were 17 and we went. We saved up, cost $200 back then. We saved up money to go take the class with Transcendental meditation. I mean, I really want it.

And I was a meditator for most of my life, except for that whole period when we were married. And then. And then suddenly I’m like, well, I guess if he’s not really into it, I can just meditate and, you know, get into these practices, and I can figure out how to do this right. So, you know, things go by. Eventually the marriage does what the marriage does, and we. We end up getting divorced. And, you know, I’m a lot older now, and there are certainly a lot of opportunities for casual sex, but I’m like, you know, I’m just not into that.

It’s just not. You know, I had a great time right, when I was younger, and I’m just. That’s just not where I’m at anymore. It’s funny. Nikki, who does the customer service, she says, marjorie, you get marriage proposals almost every day via email. And I’m like, look, I’m really not into it. And I figured after the divorce, I would probably take a couple of years to process it, because it was. That was. That was the hardest thing I ever did in my life. And honestly, from my side, it was really very amicable. He had his own process, which was a little difficult for me.

But, you know, the thing on a rural country road, you wave and smile at everybody, but really, on this road, there’s only about 30 houses. So he kind of starts. Know everybody. Yeah. So where was I? So. And it actually took a lot longer than two years. And then, you know, I’m out there and I’m looking, and I’m like, you know, all the stuff you do now. When I had been single before, I was like, always wanted to be in relationship, and a partner was a big deal. Right. I wanted a partner. Like, when you’re alone, you really want a partner.

Right. I thought I stepped on a snake. No, it’s just a thing. And, you know, there’s that hunger, right? And I get it. And as a younger woman, I mean, there’s this raw sexuality that you just. You’ve just got. Right? And that’s a part of your makeup as a young woman. And I’ve since seen it now in other young women. And I go, yeah, I see what you’re doing. And I remember meeting God bless her. I don’t know if she’s alive. Not anymore. Patricia Allison is an older. She was about 20 years older than I am.

And she. And I got to. She’s permaculture design teacher. I got. I got. I did her permaculture design certification with that. Whoops. Let me step over here. Hi. This road is really very narrow, so everybody kind of knows where there Might be a ledge that you can either step off or where two cars could pass you. Most of the cars cannot pass each other on this road. It’s a wonderful, wonderful little road. And the great thing about it is nobody goes too fast because you would probably die. They know that even the Puerto Ricans are pretty crazy drivers know that.

So I remember talking to Patricia one time years ago, and she was saying, you know, one of the wonderful things about getting older is she says, I used to just have this incredible sexual energy and it’s just not there anymore. It’s not that I’m not sexual, but it’s just not that overwhelming, you know, kind of ravenous, all consuming thing. And I thought, wow, that was really interesting because I was still into the, like, you know, during the marriage. We had a really, really, really good relationship. We were really on it, on the physical level, and that was wonderful.

So a lot of best evers, right? I couldn’t even imagine it then. Just sort of like when I had been, you know, decades earlier and they talked about where you can move that energy up. So anyway, so some years go by and I’m like, okay, I’m going to start looking. And then you know how it is when you’re looking and every event you go to, you’re kind of checking people out or, you know, maybe I’ll go to that event because somebody might be there, you know, and then I’m wondering, who do I want anymore? And, you know, for a while there, I was actually playing with the idea of being in relationship with a woman, because honestly, men do not have a lot of emotional intelligence and bless their hearts, they have a lot of other characteristics, you know.

And I was listening to Cliff High recently, and Cliff was talking about the difference between men and women, and he was openly acknowledging that. And he was talking about real men, men that have a lot of testosterone that are, you know, viral, you know, not necessarily some of these, the men that are being turned out now that are not really men, almost more like women. And he was saying, you know, I think men think about sex like 17 times more than women or something. And they, and they also, they don’t. He was, you know, we just don’t have the levels of feeling that women have.

There is a distinction between the sexes. And he was even saying, I just can’t even imagine what it would be like to be a woman, to have those levels of feeling. And I thought, well, you know, he’s absolutely right. And I think for me, emotional maturity is like a really, really important thing. Really looking up at the moon. It’s wonderful. But so then I’ve been, as we’ve been entering into this apocalypse. That’s what it really is. You know, we’re into apocalypse and we’re into collapse. We’re into this huge, huge, incredible change, which I think is going to be wonderful.

Going to be very challenging and very difficult. So, like a lot of other people, I’m getting way more interested in spiritual practices and spiritual sciences. And I’m also here, I’ll show you a picture of my house in the background there. I’m kind of calling it the Hermitage. I’m going to climb up on the roof and show you the view. It’s on this way back on this country road. I’m about three miles out of town, which is a small town. So that’s kind of a long ways and mostly pretty quiet out here. And I’m beginning to do a lot of meditation and thought and contemplation.

Oh, good. I’m going to see if I can get up on the roof and I’ll show you the sunset. It’s really beautiful. And reading a lot Rudolf Steiner and Stiliana, Satishlas and Yogananda and Krishnamurti and reading a lot more spiritual sciences. And I started the Tibetan Book of the Dead. And I’m like, I can’t figure this thing out. So I’m going to get the Dummy’s Guide to the Tibetan Book from the Dead. My credit in audible has just come up, so I’m going to go ahead and buy that one. Yeah, and let me also jump back for a second.

You know, I did a whole lot of work with Dr. Joe Dispenza. For gosh, it was like five years. Intense, intense, intense work. And that was also actually a pretty much important thing that helped precipitate the separation and divorce. As I was choosing to change my personality, and I was choosing to change. Have a huge addiction to fear, Right. And I was choosing to change that addiction to fear. And as I was doing that, part of the lock that held the marriage together was Dave had an addiction to anger and I have an addiction to fear.

And it worked together really well. But when I started to say, I’m not going to be addicted, I’m going to change this, then, you know, the whole thing didn’t work anymore. It was a whole dynamic that was no longer happening. All right, let me see if I can get up this ladder. Hang on one second. I get some people asking me about my yard. This is so funny. Everybody’s like, what Is that plant in the background? I’m going to do another video just about the house and the yard here. So, yes, you can change, change things.

And now I’ve lost lost track. So. Oh my God, that’s beautiful. So you can change your personality. And, and I chose to do this of at least a five year process, a lot more intense meditation and spiritual work and, and just doing a lot. And I, I don’t know if you can feel it. I can certainly feel it. But we are definitely in a time period where there’s a heightening. You know, like I said, I’ve been a meditator for most of my life and I feel like the insights and the flow and the connection and the synchronicities are happening at a much greater rate now.

And so there’s a real, a real quickening going on. And I believe this is happening for a lot of people, not just me. And I’m reading. I’ve also been very interested in, you know, what happens when you die. Right now I’m still pretty young, I’m only 62. I think I’ve got a while before I’m gonna die. But I’m very interested in the whole death and rebirth process, karma and that whole process. And for a long time I thought, oh, well, we don’t know. Nobody knows when you’re dead, you’re dead. And nobody, you know, they can’t talk.

But we actually do know there’s a huge, lots and lots and lots of different bodies of work where they do and they do know. First of all, there’s a lot of people who have been dead and come back. There’s numerous stuff like that. And I read this whole series of books by this one guy who was doing all this past life regressions with people and had very, very clear distinction and understanding of what happens when you’re dead in different phases. And then of course, the Tibetan Book of the Dead and then the Egyptian Book of the Dead, which I think they’re actually called the Egyptian Book of Going to the Light, but the English translation is anyway.

And there have also been a lot of ascended masters who have, you know, incarnated here to help us. And they talk about it. They like, this is what happens. And we know and they actually die and are conscious through their death and they’re conscious through their process over there. And then they’re conscious coming back and reincarnating it again. Some of them, like Daskala, still number all of his previous lives and would run into people he had known, you know, quite a Few lifestyles back, you know, lifetimes back or whatever. And that’s. I’m not going to say it’s common, but there’s more than enough of it that has happened that we have documented and that’s available.

And there’s probably a lot of them that are alive now. Like I said with. With Bru. I don’t know if Bru was really that as advanced, for example, as Daskalos, but there’s always some here, right? And they’re usually not seeking fame and fortune because that is. That’s actually. That’s actually a whole elute, you know, that’s a whole. That’s not something that’s worth pursuing, really. So that’s not their. What. They’re here and they come and they do their work. So we do know what happens when you die. And I’ve gotten very, very interested in that. So reading all the spiritual stuff and the latest thing that I’ve been reading, and this is really difficult reading with a guy named Harold Parsifal.

And he has just really, really interesting. His main book is called Thinking in Destiny. I got into that, do you remember when I got the crypto, the $10,000 worth of crypto scammed? And I was like, I’m pretty sure that’s because of what I had been thinking ahead of time, that I had set that experience up. And so I’m very interested in how I think and how my way of being is and what’s being reflected in the world. And then I was doing all kinds of meditations and asking and saying, who am I? Who am I? And then that book came into my life, and I’m going to say, oh, my God, if that book comes into your life, you know, buckle up, because it’s not easy.

A thousand pages and it’s. He apparently doesn’t have any kind of lineage. He just kept getting these downloads. And so he has his own terminology, which is a little bit hard, but oh, my goodness. He has all kinds of distinctions, which at this point in time, I don’t know if they’re true or not, but it’s absolutely fascinating. And he is very, very clear, like there are no uncertain terms, that in order to achieve your destiny as a human being, you need to not be engaged in sex. And he talks about conscious immortality and that there are.

You can work with your human body to where you have a human body that is immortal, that you heal it or regenerate it, or you have the consciousness to do that. I don’t know if I would be able to achieve that in this lifetime. And I don’t know how legitimate this guy is, but I’m really captivated by it, and I’m studying it. One thing he’s very, very, very clear about, though, is that conscious immortality is. Is it hermaphrodite or androgynous? Anyway, it’s not male or female. It’s actually both. And you. You become both. And in order to do that, you absolutely have to not be sexual and not have sex.

And, you know, if you’d have told me about that before, I would have been absolutely horrified. But honestly, I’m kind of, like, really good with that. And a while ago, I was like, I’m not finding anybody anyway, so why not? You know, why not? And I’m, like, really happy with myself and my life at this point in time. I’m really, really happy. One of the things I learned from the Joe Dispenza thing was how shift immediately if I’m in a state that’s, you know, negative or depressed or worried about money or any of that kind of nonsense, you know, feeling sick or whatever.

Absolutely can change that. Absolutely have conscious control of that, and I can change that. His and Joe’s work is. Is really good for teaching those kind of basics. And I thought, wow, you know, very interesting. So, you know, in fact, there’s a thing apparently every month, and he’s very much into the connection of your body with the stars and the. And the moon and the whole celestial movements. And your body is apparently way more connected. Your human physical body is way more connected to all those cycles and things than we normally give any kind of conscious experience to.

And every month, there is some processes that move through your body. I think they call it the Christ oil. And as long as you are not engaged in sexuality during a very particular time of that. And he recommends the whole time, other people are just saying, during a particular time, like when your sun star is in the moon or whatever. I’m still figuring all that. I never got into astrology. I always figured if I got into astrology, I’d be liking it, and then I would come out a decade or two later and wonder what happened to those two decades.

Love astrologers, though. I love hiring people that really know that stuff when I need help with a question. But anyway, now I’m starting to get into it a little bit more. And, you know, apparently if you’re keeping yourself pretty clean in terms of not being involved in sexuality and most not getting involved with negativity. So during these four or five Days a month. When this period, this process is happening in my body, I don’t like, I don’t watch the news and I spend extra time meditating. I actually spend extra time on the heart chakra. And. Yeah.

And then if anything sexual comes, I immediately move that energy up, move it up into my heart. And it’s wonderful. It really is wonderful. I totally get what those elders were talking about all those years ago in those circles with brujoy that, you know, I just can fill myself with so much love and happiness and I’m basically transmuting what used to be an incredible sexual drive into a tremendous amount of love. So there you have it. Kind of a long, long winded thing. Not sure if I’m going to post this, you know, anyway, I just thought I would riff on that.

And I don’t know, people have been. People have been getting some value out of hearing a different perspective. Oh, I did have one other perspective on that that I wanted to bring up. And that is. So we’re all very, very aware the media is completely controlled. Completely controlled. Most of the world is completely controlled. Controlled by satanic forces. Let’s be very straightforward about it. And I don’t have any issue with Satanism. You know, Satanism just means that they worship the material world, that they do not acknowledge that there is anything more than what’s here, physical rocks and water and stuff.

Right. And therefore whatever you can do and whatever you can get away with is fine. Like, they don’t acknowledge any kind of repercussions. They certainly don’t recognize, you know, karma, karmic consequences or. I don’t think they even think about what happens after you die. In fact, most of them are extremely interested in longevity because they don’t want to die. And, you know, and the music and the movies and all that and the control on that has gone back for ever, you know, since we all, you know, really forever. You might as well just, you know, certainly for centuries, if not millennium.

And I was thinking back on, oh, my God, you know, almost every movie you watch or all of a sudden, it’s all about sex. It’s all about sex. It’s all about, you know, and that drive for sexuality. And I think, wow, you know. Yeah, you know, that’s, that’s, that’s, that’s what, why I was, I’m involved in that, in that world. You know, I was involved. We are all involved in that world. Right. And I was like, wow. A lot of that came from all those role models that I saw in movies. Or on television where every song you have is about getting sex or falling in love or being involved with the opposite sex.

And I thought, wow, so this idea of not being involved with sex or love like that, on the physical level, I don’t know. Suddenly it gives me some more credence because it’s not a satanic viewpoint. Oh, well, all right, I’m gonna let you go. I think that’s most of the thoughts I had. I, you know, just love to hear your perspective on this. This is definitely not the usual here’s how to grow food type conversation, but that’s why we’re calling it off grid with Marjorie Wildcraft. Okay, I’ll talk to you later.
[tr:tra].